Transcript of Charlie Rose’s interview with Gladstone Duck, The Senior Economic Advisor to the third party candidate Mickey Mouse.

Charlie Rose: I want to welcome back Gladstone who has been my guest on many occasions. Gladstone has just completed a book $ One Trillion Dollar Nightmare. This book highlights the failure of our two major parties to address our oil addiction for more than thirty years. I think that if you read Gladstone’s book, you will be enlightened, but also saddened about our nation’s failed record on developing a credible energy program despite its importance to our economy and industrial status. I would also like to note that the creators of the “Dummy Series” have asked Gladstone to make his ideas simple enough for our politicians to understand. Before I turn to our guest, I would remind you that Gladstone has an enviable business career. He has scooped up businesses all over the world. His talent agency represents many animals, including his nephew Donald. He received our nation’s highest civilian award, the United States Medal of Freedom. With that stated, I welcome back my old friend, Gladstone.

Charlie Rose: I would like to ask you Gladstone given your vast knowledge about energy, why you have chosen not to work with either Senator Obama or Senator McCain?

Gladstone Duck:

I prefer being an independent. While there are certainly differences between the major parties, they just have not provided leadership in so many areas. In a sense, I share the cynicism of Senator Huey Long, the Kingfish of Louisiana politics in the early part of the twentieth century. I can sum up my frustrations by quoting from Senator Long “The only difference I ever found between the Democratic leadership and the Republican leadership is that one of them is skinning you from the ankle up and the other, from the ear down.”

Charlie Rose: Please share with our audience why you titled your book the $ One Trillion Dollar Nightmare?

Gladstone Duck: I multiplied the total cost of our consuming 20 million barrels daily over the course of year at $140 per barrel. Simply stated, Americans spend slightly over $ One Trillion dollars on oil and natural gas, of which $700 billion is imported.

Charlie Rose : In just a few words, can you share with us what went wrong.

Gladstone Duck: Charlie, before I discuss our mistaken policies, I would like to point out that we are not the fist civilization that has failed to respond to challenges. The Pulitzer Prize Winning historian Barbara Tuchman, wrote a book March of Folly. This book traced the origin of monumental blunders such as the Protestant Reformation, the American Revolution, and the Vietnam War. Ms. Tuchman pointed out that the leaders of great institutions frequently squander opportunities to reform even though they have been briefed by experts over extended time periods about the folly of their policies. According to Ms. Tuchman President John Kennedy sent two “so called experts” to South Vietnam. When these men returned to the White House, their findings were so different that President Kennedy supposedly asked whether they had both visited the same country!

In our case, both parties pandered to the American public rather than initiating meaningful projects that would have ramped up our usage of alternative fuels such as hydrogen, nuclear, bio fuels, geothermal, and wind power from our current 10%. The problem is even worse when you recognize that outside of nuclear, alternative fuels represent just 2% of our energy sources. The encouragement of “gas guzzlers” rather than fuel efficient vehicles such as hybrids, battery run cars, or hydrogen run cars is a national disgrace, especially since technologically we could have manufactured millions of the very efficient vehicles.

Our mass transit system is totally broken. I would like to point out that before World War II, America had more railroad tracks than the rest of the world combined! It is hard to believe that

  • Brazil is energy self-sufficient,

  • France and Japan obtain most of their energy from nuclear power

  • Germany has more up to date solar facilities

  • The Philippines lead the world in geothermal

Charlie Rose: How important is energy in the scheme of things?

Gladstone Duck: I think you must understand that the foundation of civilization is based on energy. Energy has allowed man to escape the drudgery of a cave man existence. Of course, harnessing energy is expensive. The cost of energy represents about 10% of the world gross national product.

Moreover, those countries that harnessed or controlled the most up to date energy sources dominated their societies. For example, Great Britain became the preeminent commercial power in the eighteenth century because of their “state of the art” usage of coal.

America achieved its number one industrial status with the dawn of the hydrocarbon age. You might recall that as late as the 1930’s America produced over 75% of the world’s oil. In fact, America’s oil saved the allies during World War II.

Charlie Rose: Could you in simple terms highlight our current problem?

Gladstone Duck: American consumes about 20 million barrels daily which is the equivalent of a 25 floor skyscraper every day. We use about twenty-five times more oil per capita than residents of China and India. When India and China industrialize, their consumption will grow geometrically, completely outstripping supply.

I would like to point out that despite oil prices doubling over the past twelve months, its global demand is still growing. That is, the daily global demand of some 80 million barrels seems impervious to escalating prices. Recently, the markets shrugged off the announcement that Saudi Arabia hopes to increase production by 200,000 barrels daily. Traders instantly knew that 200,000 barrels is a blip, a speck of sand given the enormity of global oil demand.

As you know Charlie, I have become famous for given dimes to indigents. In essence, Saudi Arabia increasing production by 200,000 barrels is “tokenism.”

Charlie Rose: Do you feel the Democrat criticism of John McCain for changing his mind about exploring for new oil sources in the Artic of offshore is valid?

Gladstone Duck: Let me say I do not know for certain about the environmental impact. However, I believe that we can drill for oil and fulfill our “green” fiduciary obligations. I would like to point out that off shore drilling and drilling in remote regions has been done without environmental damage all over the world!

In fact, I really do not understand why environmentalists bemoan drilling on a small portion of Alaska. Someday, I would like the environmentalists to tell me where they would like the oil companies to drill. Would they prefer you drill in downtown Dallas, instead of some remote barren area? While I oppose President Bush on many issues, I do sympathize with his recent comments that he finds it disingenuous to ask Saudi Arabia to drill more while we are holding back our reserves for a date to be determined!

Charlie Rose: Is it true that you criticized Senator Obama over his opposition to leasing off shore drilling rights.

Gladstone Duck: I want to point out that for many years, going back to his days as an Illinois state legislator, I have been a supporter, advisor and friend to Senator Obama. However on this issue, I think Obama’s position is “wacky.”

I find it even more frustrating that bright people just repeat ad nausea the “party line.” To my disgust, I have heard a whole host of Democrats fill the airwaves repeating word for word Senator Obama’s position, without introducing a shred of new intelligence on the subject. I get the impression that keynote Democrats get “the party line” over the internet, and just rehash these points without any independent thinking. Their spouting the party line makes a mockery of the news.

I would like to go on to say that it is pure gibberish that we should not drill because we cannot get new oil for 10 years. First of all, I think if we made a major effort, we could get the oil out much faster. Secondly, every major project takes time. Do you not build a computer chip factory, a shopping mall, or educate a child because the payback is in years and not days!

Charlie Rose: I recently heard experts say that speculators are responsible for adding possibly $40 to the price of a barrel of oil.

Gladstone Duck: My trading experience leads me to a completely opposite view. In essence, over the long term the market not traders determines the right price. The father of economics, Adam Smith, in 1776 pointed out that the “invisible wing” assures us the best products at the best prices.

Charlie Rose: Do you think that Senator McCain “flipped flopped” on the issue of drilling.

Gladstone Duck: Charlie, I want to state that my preferred candidate is Mickey Mouse. However, on this issue, I think on balance Senator McCain is right about drilling.

I support fully McCain’s right to change his opinion. His stance is pretty reasonable about finding new sources of oil now that the problem is a $1 trillion dollar one rather than let us say a $100 billion one when President Bush came to office. In my day, we applauded politicians who said that would rather be “right than consistent.” How many pacifists in the 1930’s became militarists in the wake of Hitler’s threat to mankind? Would you rather Charles Lindberg have been elected president over Franklin Roosevelt?

Charlie Rose: Do you think Saudi Arabia has a responsibility to help us out?

Gladstone Duck: Frankly, even my nephew Donald who is not the sharpest tool in the box knows not to count on a dole or oil stamps from anybody. I even think some of our politicians are bi-polar. I just quack when one day we hear “we are the richest nation in the world, and the next day we should go “cap in hand” to the Saudis to lower oil prices.

Since I have web feet, I would like to say that when the galoshes were on the other web foot, we did not give two dimes to the Saudis. I do not remember us sending them checks when the price of oil dropped to $10 in the early 1990s. Stated differently, Saudi Arabia is a welfare state. The Saudi royal house keeps in power by massive transfer payments to its 25 million inhabitants.

Charlie Rose: What do you think about alternative fuel sources?

Gladstone Duck: There is not one single “silver bullet.” We are already using bio fuels, geothermal, solar, and wind power. The challenge is ramping up production of these “green technologies” from 1-2% to 50% over the next generation. In order to achieve viable “green technologies” we need to jump start a whole host of programs. The one black box that I cannot get a handle on is oil shale in Colorado. I would think that at today’s prices, we should really put some effort behind commercializing oil shale.

Charlie Rose: In concluding I want to thank our guest and certainly welcome back to this table in the near future. Hopefully, some “crazy Texans” will not assassinate Gladstone. Even Dick Cheney almost plugged Gladstone and they are even friends!

Originally published in the Sarasota Herald-Tribune